Four years ago when PositiveLite.com last wrote about HIV-positive Brittany Cameron she was a client of Peterborough’s PARN - Your Community AIDS Resource Network. She talked about positive parenting, bringing three little girls into the world, all HIV-negative. Since then she has gone back to school and become a staff member at the same agency, facing new challenges.
Bob Leahy: Hi Brittany. Let’s start by telling me a little about the job you’re in.
Brittany Cameron: I’m the peer engagement worker at PARN. It’s a new position that was created in the last year from recommendations that came out of a program review here. It’s a position that’s specifically for someone living with HIV. Essentially what I do is I help develop programs for people living with and affected or at risk of HIV.
Tell me a little bit about PARN. It’s a Peterborough-based agency with a large rural catchment area. That must present challenges for engaging people.
Absolutely. The catchment area is huge. It’s estimated there are 1,400 people living with HIV.in that area and there is a lot of difficulty in terms of reaching out to those people.
Before you got the job you were a client of the agency – you still are. But going back in time, do you want to talk about your life before you became positive?
Sure. Previous to my HIV diagnosis ten years ago I was engaged in survival sex work. I was also a user of crack cocaine. A large portion of my youth was in Toronto. I ended up facing some criminal justice issues and then ended up moving to Montreal I spent about eight years on the street.
How do you look back on that period of your life?
Definitely hard. I don’t look back on it with shame or anything like that, though. I really think those years were critical in making me who I am as a person today. No regrets.
But I’m guessing that that lifestyle resulted in you becoming HIV-positive?
Yes. I suspect I was probably infected around July of 2005. But I wasn’t diagnosed until the following year. In September of 2005 I found out I was pregnant. I did get an HIV test but unfortunately some criminal justice issues came up and I didn’t get the test results. After that I moved to Peterborough in hopes of starting a new life, getting sober, getting off the streets – and being a mom.
So at what point did you find out you were HIV-positive - after the baby was born?
In prenatal testing. It wasn’t until I was 36 weeks pregnant that I was able to get a doctor and at the point. I was diagnosed over the phone. The doctor told me she had never delivered a positive woman’s baby and my options were either to be her test run or to go to Mount Sinai Hospital in Toronto, to their High-Risk Pregnancy Unit for babies of HIV-positive moms.
You started antiretrovirals then in your 36th week. You must have been on tenterhooks as to whether the baby was going to be poz, right?
To be honest I was really so early in my diagnosis that I didn’t really know about undetectable viral load and anything. But any kind of viral load is an indicator for a Caesarian and to the best of my knowledge I was still probably detectable, so that’s what I had.
But were you worried about having a poz baby?
Absolutely, I was not very well educated and although the doctors reassured me they were reducing the risk, I didn’t know anything then. Not only did I think I was dying but I was going to bring a child into the world that would die.
The baby was tested right away?
Yes. The infectious disease specialist came over to the hospital and drew the first blood sample. As with first infants born to a positive mother, the first test was positive because they carry mom’s antibodies. So I continued three months visits and at 18 months they confirmed that her antibodies had flipped to her own and she was in fact HIV-negative.
How did that feel?
Amazing!
I bet! That was your first child and you went on to have two more children?
I did. After my diagnosis, I started doing a lot of research and reading other positive moms’ stories and I realized that if women with HIV wanted babies they could have babies that were born without HIV. It was really a fairly simple task to ensure an HIV-negative baby. I had since split with my former partner who was the father of my first baby and met my present partner, Jason. The risk of having a positive baby was less than 1% but that 1% plays on a mother. I think with all three of my children those first 18 months were the hardest time of my life – there was still that minute chance.
That is an amazing story. But another amazing story happened after that.
Well, it was about six years ago that I decided I wanted to get more engaged and bring about awareness of HIV and positive motherhood, really started ramping up and getting involved in leadership development and such. And I felt there was just not enough going on for people living with HIV in our community. It was at that point I decided I was going back to school, I’m going to get an education and then I’m going to work for PARN. I had dropped out in Grade 9, then got my grade 12 and I went back to get my Social Service diploma and graduated with honours.
And during that time you were open about your status and had your photos in the media. Tell me why you were comfortable with that when so many others don’t want other people to know their status.
For me it’s about putting a face to HIV. We have been bombarded with photos of really ill people and I wanted to help change society’s view of how a person living with HIV looks. Often that’s really uncomfortable work but for me it’s a bigger picture thing. I’m open about my status because there are many, many people out there who can’t. It opens minds.
So the job you are in now, this was a new position you had to get through a competitive process. Let’s talk about the transition from a client to an employee. How easy was that for you?
It’s definitely an ongoing process. It’s not easy. A lot of the people who are now my clients were friends before. But most of them have embraced where I have come from and what I have done to get to this place. Also it says to them that this is possible for them as well. Plus I still get services from PARN. We didn’t want to have people living with HIV going in to a paid position and being disadvantaged by losing services they were previously using.
I’m hearing there are challenges but also benefits to a person living with HIV being in that kind of position?
Absolutely. I think the biggest and best benefit for me is being able to empower my peers and watching them grow. I have seen them go to rock bottom and then go on to take peer leadership roles and it’s amazing to see the growth that’s possible and get to the same place as me.
And outside PARN you are a busy person also. You have three kids and a husband, you have your own little business. How do you manage all this?
Well, definitely in any work we do I think it’s important to recognize self-care – and so my family and kids always come first. I’m not shy in saying I need a break. I’m very lucky our Executive Director is very understanding and I’ve never had an issue in going to her and saying ”I need a day off”. It’s been critical that I’ve been supported like that.
Do you find working in this environment stressful? Are you able to leave it when you go home at night?
Sometimes it’s stressful. A friend of mine who is also a client and a friend of my husband passed away last month. So both work and home were experiencing grief and trauma and that was really hard to navigate. That being said I’m a person living with HIV and I am really passionate about the work, so it’s not often I do shut it off.
You’re happy in your work then?
Absolutely, I wouldn’t change it for the world, Bob. PARN gave me so much in my first eight years of being positive and this is my time to give back.
OK. One more question. Looking back on your transition from client to staff, what would you say to other people living with HIV who were contemplating that kind of jump?
I’d say “go for it!” We need more people living with HIIV steering the ship. It’s not necessarily an easy change but there is space within the AIDS movement to be paid for our work and that opportunity is really important to me.
Brittany, that’s a nice note to end on. You’re an inspiration. Good luck with your future work and thank you for talking to PositiveLite.com
Brittany with former PARN support worker Chris Campbell, who supported Brittany to get where she is today.
You can follow Brittany on Facebook here.
See also Poz Place on Facebook here.